"Being a “Better” Visitor Is Not Enough"

Yes, you are a visitor.

Whether you identify as a "digital nomad", "tourist", "traveler", or "expat", the reality is the same:

No matter how long you stay in a country outside your own, you do not become part of the land, the history, or the lived realities of the people whose home it is.

But recognizing yourself as a visitor is only the beginning.

Most visitors truly have little regard for how their presence affects the peoples and lands they are on, for some people, the focus or idea does become how to be a “good” visitor - how to be respectful, how to take up less space, how to avoid causing harm. While this matters, it often stays at the level of behaviour.

And behaviour alone does not address the deeper issue.

Because the reality is, when you move through lands shaped by colonization, your presence is not neutral. You are entering spaces where histories of displacement, extraction, and systemic inequality continue to shape everyday life.

Even if you stay for years, you are not carrying those histories in your body in the same way.

And you retain something many others do not - the ability to leave.

This matters.

Not as a point of guilt, but as a point of responsibility.

Beyond the Idea of the “Visitor”

The language of being a “visitor” can be helpful. It reminds us that we are not entitled to the spaces we move through.

But it can also become a way to remain comfortable.

To focus on being respectful, while avoiding deeper questions about power, impact, and the systems we are still part of.

This is where the shift is needed.

Not just in how we act, but in how we understand our position.

This is not about being a better visitor. It is not about being a helper or an ally.

It is about taking responsibility for ourselves.

For how we live.For how we relate.For how we benefit from and participate in systems that continue to shape the places we move through.

The Impact of Our Presence

Your presence has impact - whether you intend it or not.

It shapes local economies. It influences cultural dynamics. It can contribute to displacement, gentrification, and the commodification of culture.

Even actions that feel respectful or well-intentioned can still participate in patterns of extraction.

This is why intention is not enough.

What matters is awareness, accountability, and a willingness to examine how we are participating in the systems around us.

Where the Work Actually Begins

For many of us, especially those racialized as white, this work is not just about learning how to engage with others more appropriately.

It is about turning inward.

Because disconnection from land, ancestry, and community is not something we resolve by adopting practices from other cultures or trying to integrate ourselves into spaces that are not ours.

For many, access to ancestral lands, languages, and ways of being has been fragmented or erased through generations of colonization and assimilation.

This creates a kind of rootlessness.

And that rootlessness does not get resolved externally.

It requires internal work.

It asks us to examine:

• how we understand ourselves

• how we relate to land and belonging

• how we move through the world without defaulting to consumption, entitlement, or extraction

Shifting from Consumption to Relationship

What is required is a shift.

From consumption to relationship.

From awareness to accountability.

From identity to practice.

This means:

• taking responsibility for how we show up

• engaging with humility rather than entitlement

• recognizing that we are not the center of the spaces we move through

• being willing to be uncomfortable, challenged, and accountable

It also means letting go of the need to be seen as good, aware, or “doing the right thing.”

Because this work is not about perception.

It is about integrity.

Living This in Practice

There is no checklist that resolves this.

But there are ways of beginning:

• Commit to ongoing learning - not for self-improvement, but for awareness and responsibility

• Listen more than you speak, especially to those whose lived realities differ from your own

• Be mindful of how your presence impacts local communities, economies, and environments

• Engage in ways that support rather than extract, guided by relationship, not convenience

• Reflect honestly on where you benefit from systems of inequality, and what responsibility that creates

These are not solutions.

They are entry points into deeper, ongoing work.

A Different Way of Moving

Being a visitor is a reality.

But it is not the goal.

The work is not to perfect how we visit.

The work is to transform how we exist.

To move through the world with awareness of where we are, whose land we are on, and what our presence means within that context.

To take responsibility for ourselves - not just in moments of interaction, but in how we live, relate, and participate in the systems around us.

This is where relationship becomes possible.

Not through performance.

But through accountability, humility, and a willingness to do the work that is ours to do.

Disclaimer:

Ideas for this insight by (me!) Carly, with writing support from AI

—without which my ideas would stay stuck 😊

The information has been carefully reviewed, but mistakes can happen

—whether by humans or robots 🤖